CPR

At the new job, I was assigned to teach a class every Saturday morning after the guy that used to sit next to me got fired on my 3rd day there. I didn't like the idea of givnig up every frickin' Saturday morning, but somebody had to do it. I agreed only under the condition that I will only do this for a few months.

Only at my company would anyone be told to do things that they've never done before without any sort of training or much explanation at all. Keep in mind that this was my first week. My 3rd day. I've never been to that Saturday class. Luckily, there were others who have done it before so they were able to explain to me what to do, what to expect, etc. One of them told me not to be surprised if I get students showing up drunk/under the influence because this is not a treatment group.

So last Saturday morning, I decide to walk to work (which I decided not to do anymore for reasons you're about to read). As I approach the building, I see a man passed out on the wall near the door, just as my coworkers predicted.

For some reason, I didn't really think to check to see if he's ok or call 911. I don't know why. I guess I assumed he'll be fine. He obviously had a bit too much fun the night before. He had funky blonde hair with some spots of bright colors, a piercing coming out of just below his lower lip, red jacket with no shirt underneath, and black thong hanging out of his black leather pants. How ironic it is that he is passed out in front of a DRUG TREATMENT FACILITY. There is no sign outside the building so there is no way that he came looking for help.

A client walks into the lobby and suggests that I call 911 because there was a can (alcohol or spray??) next to him and foam on his mouth. I call and explain to the dispatcher that there is a man passed out in front of my building. Just as I'm talking, a patrol car drives by without stopping. OK, I don't feel so bad for ignoring him anymore.

The dispatcher patches me through to paramedics and they tell me to go see if he's conscious and have someone who knows CPR stay with him until the paramedics get there.

Well, that person who knows CPR is me. No one else had arrived. Not even security.

Do I really have to do this?? Do I really have to give this black-thonged man mouth to mouth? The bigger question was, how do I give him rescue breaths without being poked with that long-ass piercing??

Before I come to any conclusions, I go outside and hide behind the wall as I ask him if he's alright. He wakes up!! Then the paramedics arrived. Whew! but the bastard decided he didn't want help and walked away from the paramedics.

In any CPR training, they probably tell you to check to see if the person is breathing, then call 911. Had I done that in the first place, I didn't have to go through any of this. Even with proper training I guess you don't know how you'll react until you're faced with a real situation. My CPR training never mentioned any of these obstacles. Hope my readers will be better prepared.